Warning: I strayed from the regularly scheduled blogging and went with a more childish topic… I couldn’t resist…
So… I went to my Restorative Yoga class tonight, as I do every Thursday evening. Yet somehow tonight was going to be different.
I went to class and met up with my friend, there was only the two of us tonight. Usually there are three of us. Was this why things were different? As we enter into the yoga room. Very quiet, serene, candles lit… the lights are dimmed and I feel relaxed the moment I enter the room. I love this place. I look forward to it every week. It’s the one place I go to that I know my body will actually cooperate. I love this hour of relief that I get from my fibromyalgia. I go to my spot and put my mat down and apologize for dropping it just a bit too loudly on the ground. I whisper as I talk to my friend. It’s really warm in the room tonight. Is this what is different? No… wait, there are two men in this class. That’s different.
As I start to put my second mat down on the ground, I hear from behind me, the man laying on his mat let one loose… I mean he seriously RIPS ONE. wow. THIS is what is different.
I just keep talking to my friend like nothing happened. I’m going to give that man a one time gas pass. The class has not started yet. We are all warming up and hey… stuff happens! I’m going to let that slide. We all have our slip ups… you know, we’ve all slipped up.
The instructor comes in and we start warming up. For the next 10-15 minutes we stretch and do the normal breathing exercises to prepare for the restorative poses. I am relaxed and focusing on my breathing. The gas man is no longer on the brain.
Instructor: “Let’s get ready for our first pose.”
We all take our mats towards the walls and I get in the first pose. I am so ready to meditate.
Instructor: “I want you to just relax and let all the…….”
Gas Man strikes again… PFFFFFFFFFGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!
and again… PFFFFFGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!
and again… PFFGGGGHHHH!!!!!
and again PFFFFFFFFFFGGGGHHHHFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!
Instructor: “… stress of the week leave your mind… as you breathe in say “LET” and as you breathe out say “GO” …. “L…E….T………………G….O…..””
Seriously. SERIOUSLY?? Did he just say that? I mean I know he says that every week, but couldn’t he have come up with some new material JUST FOR TONIGHT? I was no longer relaxed. I was dying inside. I knew if I even whispered a laugh I was going to lose it. I would not be able to stop laughing. I would have to leave my favorite yoga place and never return. I would die of embarrassment for laughing like a 6-yr old at the gas man.
I couldn’t look at my friend, I couldn’t talk, I couldn’t think about what happened. Here I was in my yoga class… NOT relaxing. I started to count… I started to think about funerals, arguments I’ve had, anything that would NOT make me laugh. I had another 45 minutes of class… this was going to be a long class…. this was a challenge. Thank goodness my other friend didn’t come, there is absolutely no way she would have been able to make it through that moment. That would have been my last yoga class.
Needless to say… I did make it through and the rest of the class was quiet, thank goodness!
Well, it could have been worse. I could have been the one with gas!
Thanks for reading! Stay cool.